Re: JCO: Missing Mom

Hi Cyrano,

Yes, I think November would be a good time to discuss the book. Hopefully
several people in the group will have read it or be reading it then so we
can discuss aspects of the book.

I hadn�t heard that Marya was based on her mother. That�s interesting
because I always assumed it was based more on Oates own experience of
university.
Yes, no doubt these irrational frustrations and directionless pain inform
the body of a lot of Oates� fiction. But the real writing and craftmanship
that examines this pain begins with Oates� fearless ability to question why,
a kind of philosophical investigation into the mystery of these stultifying
emotions. A person can objectively state that feelings of rejection from
being given up for adoption should be dismissed because it obviously has
nothing to do with them personally, but the circumstances involved. But, of
course, such feelings aren�t so easy to overcome. Oates ability to
illustrate the manifestations of this pain which defies ration is what makes
her fiction so compelling I think.

Eric

>From: Cyranomish@aol.com
>Reply-To: jco@usfca.edu
>To: jco@usfca.edu
>Subject: Re: JCO: Missing Mom
>Date: Wed, 12 Oct 2005 09:04:21 EDT
>
>Hi, Eric. I look forward to getting my copy of Missing Mom later this
>month.
> I always read a book before I read its reviews, or even the raves on the
>book's paper overjacket: a worthy old book-reviewing habit. Discussions of
>JCO's
>latest books here on Tone Clusters too often begin and end with the reviews
>-- and various angry reactions to reviewers who seem envious and/or
>ignorant.
>Would November be a good month for a general discussion here of the book
>and
>our own unmediated reactions to it? I expect to have MM read by the end of
>October. (MM is not one of the books I'm reviewing this year, and someone
>else
>took it out of the newspaper slush pile before I could get it -- dang!)
> It's a happy coincidence you mentioned "About Schmidt." I just saw
>it
>last weekend for the second time and realized how refreshing it is to see a
>character study movie done so well -- and with a major star like Nicholson.
> The
>ending of that film is so beautiful. And Nicholson's performance as a
>Midwestern businessman -- my family is full of them -- is a gem. Not many
>actors
>would consent to being filmed sitting on a toilet in the abject,
>"hen-pecked"
>manner that Schmidt does.
> "The brutality of never mattering" is an interesting issue. JCO has
>in
>past interviews noted her mother's lifelong pain at having been put out for
>adoption by her own parents. From what I understand, JCO's mother was
>raised by
>other relatives who lived nearby -- the heroine of MARYA, a character
>inspired
>partly by JCO's mother, according to interviews with JCO around the time of
>MARYA's publication -- had a similar situation. Being, in effect,
>"rejected"
>by one's own mother and then raised in close proximity to that mother must
>have
>been very painful. And pain is a rich lode for fiction-writing.
>Cyrano
>
>
>In a message dated 10/11/2005 1:47:24 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
>erickarl78@hotmail.com writes:
>
><< To me it felt like she was circling around Missing Mom in favour of
>talking
> about her admiration for Oates’ work in general and her overall respect
>for
> what she’s produced. She did make me think about the novel from a
>different
> point of view though, that perhaps Oates was contemplating “the
>brutality of
> never mattering” and class politics instead of just the personal
>process of
> a period of grieving. This is a similar idea to the one expressed in the
> excellent film “About Schmidt”. In this movie, a man at retirement
>age who
> has led a very straightforward life begins questioning what the
>accumulation
> of all his little life’s details signifies when contemplating if he
>really
> matters to the world. It’s an unsettling thought and one which Oates
> protagonist of Missing Mom is obviously struggling with when examining
>the
> physical things that amount to her parents’ life work. >>
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